"First Timers"

I've always been impressed by women who have known exactly what they want for their first birth.

I'm in awe of women who choose to home birth their first baby (in a good way, I think it's awesome!).

I'm really pleased when I hear that first time mums don't hang on to every word their doctor/s or midwives say, but take that information on board, research/investigate it, and come to their own conclusions.

I love it when first time mums aren't afraid of birth, but rather embrace it and look forward to it.

I love it when first time mums are passionate about natural birth and know they can do it and know that it's normal and see themselves as one of the many thousands of women who have done this before them.

I guess I see in these women what I wish I would have been myself. I'm an educated, intelligent woman - I got good grades in school, I have a university degree, I learnt (and taught) critical literacy (as in, analysing the messages in texts/language/any form of communication, looking for bias etc). So why, when it came to pregnancy and birth, did I hand over all power to my care providers? Why did I not question the information I was given, as I had been taught to do with everything else?

I just read this blog post, which pretty well sums up my thinking. These quotes in particular struck me...

"Many no longer feel confident in their inner power to give birth. The society in general makes us believe that women are faulty machines which always need someone to give birth for them, technologies, surgical intervention, and medications" - so basically, many women don't question what is happening to them because they are too busy questioning themselves and their ability, now that it seems common in society to treat pregnancy and birth as something pathological (an 'illness' needing to be managed/cured) and the way society as a whole views doctors (including obstetricians) as Gods.

"If we are truly going to reform the health care system in the U.S.,” Dr. Russell said, “everybody has to participate actively and must educate themselves. That means doctors, nurses, other health care professionals, lawyers, pharmaceutical companies, and insurance companies. But most of all, it means the patient.”
Trust is important. But as Sir Francis Bacon, who was among the first to understand the importance of gathering data in science, once observed, knowledge is power.

"Patients are more likely to spend time researching a job change (on average, about 10 hours) or a new car (8 hours) than the operation they are about to submit to or the surgeon who wields the knife. And many patients are satisfied with the answers they receive from their surgeon or primary care doctor, whoever those individuals happen to be."

Taken from HERE

I admit it - with my first baby, I probably can safely say I spent more time choosing a phone plan than a care provider!!!!!! I look back now and think that's crazy!!!! Having a baby is one of THE most defining moment's of a woman's/family's life - more so than what will be in next week's meal plan, which internet provider to go with, how to arrange the furniture, what kind of car to buy...No doubt we would ask a care salesperson many, many questions before buying from them - and if we don't like the answers, we would simply go somewhere else. Why does this not happen in pregnancy and birth? Why are so many women accepting inferior care, giving in to scare tactics/bullying, not being listened to, continuing with care providers even where they have doubts/concerns...just because they have the word 'doctor' in front of their name?

To me, that is the essence of my work - to show women that they have choices. They have power. They are in charge. They know their bodies better than anyone else. They are strong, and capable. I want to guide them in finding their own inner strength, to encourage them to ask questions and simply to question what they read, what they are told, etc, in order for them to make fully informed choices.

Yesterday I had the pleasure of speaking with a first time mother who is just over half way through her pregnancy, and I must admit I was impressed with her attitude towards labour and birth - I loved talking with her and hearing her plans for the birth, and to see her view it as something so normal.. I have only met her once, but I really admire her, and I think she will have an amazing birth, no matter where or how she gives birth. Simply because she is supported, she is informed, and she is in control. I am very honoured to have been given a chance to share in her journey.